


Fun.

by AliTheHierophant



Category: Guild Wars 2 (Video Game)
Genre: AU where everyone lives, Angst, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, HoT Spoilers, pof spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-31 00:36:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13963494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliTheHierophant/pseuds/AliTheHierophant
Summary: From the top of the worldThe top of the wavesWe said forever, forever alwaysWe could have been lost,We would have been saved





	Fun.

Dating someone such as the Marshal of the Pact sounded a lot more troubling and complicated than it actually was. Then again, dating someone such as yourself was a lot more complicated than it sounded, but Trahearne didn't seem to mind.

At first, the hardest part was having time for yourselves. Meetings, missions, paperwork, more meetings... Really, the only time you ever had for yourselves were nights when neither was out, saving Tyria from whatever dragon minion infestation you were told about.

But you figured it out, eventually. And then it was great.   
People knew better than to take away that time from you both. Not because you were jealous or possessive over each other, no, it was merely the fact that you wanted to make up for all the time you hadn't had before your relationship had been established.

Sometimes, late at night, when you'd be curled up together, watching the stars, you'd quietly whisper "I love you"s to each other. And you knew it was genuine love. Real, as real as the stars in the sky.

"Trahearne," you'd normally whisper. "You know how many stars are there in the sky?"

Trahearne would pause, and shake his head. "I've never had the chance to count them." He'd admit.

You'd giggle and nuzzle his neck. "My love for you is as infinite as the stars in the sky."

Trahearne would chuckle, and hug you closer.

Those were the good times.

\---

As with every relationship, sometimes discrepancies would come up. Especially when it came to late night work, since Trahearne had a really bad habit of not warning you about it. Sometimes, he would go for days, without you knowing where, or for how long.

You knew he was working; it was always work. But you couldn't help get anxious, worried that he might've been abducted again, taken by a new, bigger threat, his life on thin ice. So when he returned, every time, he would find you in the middle of a breakdown, worried to the core and hoping that your anxiety was just playing a cruel illusion on you.

And every time, that was the case.

Trahearne was one of the few that knew how to calm you down. And every time this would happen, he was the one that would take care of it. That is, until your breakdowns would knock you out cold, which meant that when he came back, instead of finding an anxious, sobbing mess, he would find you sleeping at your desk, shivering and occasionally jumping in your seat at the nerve-wracking nightmares that plagued your slumber. On those nights, Trahearne would bring you to bed, and tenderly tuck you in, then curl up against you, holding you close. He knew, after all, that this was what you wanted.

Closeness. You were touch starved, and he was the nurturing lover that you needed.

When you woke up the morning after, you sighed in relief yet again at the sight of your Marshal sleeping next to you. For a moment, you'd forget the anguish and the despair that his absence had caused the nights before, and you would reach up to kiss his face gently.

He woke up, and looked at you with a small smile. "I'm sorry for coming back so late last night." he whispered, kissing your lips. You sighed into the kiss and hugged him tighter.  
"It's alright, Trahearne," you whispered back. "I know you're busy. I just wish you would tell me, so I don't wait up and get worried."

Trahearne shifted uncomfortably, then stroked your back. "I'm sorry, love. I'm not... I'm not one to report often to someone. I have never had a need to do it." He admitted, stroking your body slowly. You sighed again and looked up at him.

"I'm only asking that you give me a heads up. Every time that you leave and take longer than anticipated for whatever it is that you're doing, I get worried, and anxious." You took a deep breath before continuing. "I think back to when Mordremoth caught you and... And Logan, and Zojja... I just can't handle the thought of losing you." You finally said, closing your eyes at the words. "Not like this. Not again. I'm not strong enough."

It wasn't until you looked up that you realised that he tensed up, clenching his jaw at the thought of being captured again by an Elder Dragon.  
"I understand, my love," He replied, closing his eyes too. "I'm sorry. I just... I don't think I'm the best partner for you, considering... All of this."

You froze. _What?_

"No- no, Trahearne--" You quickly replied, giving him a worried look. "That's- not what I said! I mean- I just really, really want to be sure you're safe. I would go with you, but... I have to stay here, and do the work that you can't do while you're away..."

"I know." He replied curtly. "And I need you to be here." Trahearne took a deep breath, and pulled away from you, getting on his feet so he could get dressed. "But I mean that I don't think I'm the ideal partner for you, considering... That I'm never really here."

You shook your head, frozen in place. "No- no, I don't care or worry about the distance, that's- We have figured that out, haven't we?" You replied, feeling your heartbeat in your ears. Trahearne shrugged and looked away. You looked at him in disbelief and sighed in defeat.

"Commander," He murmured softly after a long pause, making you look up again. He was fully dressed now, standing by the door to your room. "You remember those odd nightmares that you keep getting, where I lay with someone other than yourself?"

You swallowed hard and nodded. "Wh-what about them?"

Trahearne looked down at his hands and then away from you. "I have a dark feeling that those nightmares may come true one day. And, you know? I wouldn't want to do that to you. I don't think you deserve that kind of pain." Tears began streaming down your face as the weight of his words settled in your mind.

"Is there someone else?" You asked breathlessly, choking back a sob. He shook his head. "Then why would you say that?" You demanded, clenching your teeth.

"There's an... Upcoming trip for me. Along with several others from the Pact..." He began to explain, refusing to look at you. "There's someone... Someone I find tempting. And I would feel like a hypocrite to cheat on you with them..."

"Then don't!" You yelled, feeling your blood boil and your skin heat up, breathing heavy and clenching your jaw to avoid jumping out of bed to punch him instead. 

"You know me," Trahearne replied quietly. "I'm impulsive when I want something."

_So that was it._ You gave him a bitter glare, and got on your feet, quickly gathering your own clothes to get dressed.

Before you could say anything else, a knock at the door interrupted you both. You knew what it meant.

"I have to go now." Trahearne murmured. You nodded, not looking at him as you got dressed, your hands shaking from the flood of adrenaline in your veins.

"Do you want to break up with me?" You snapped out, right as he opened the door.

Trahearne pondered the thought for a moment. "Let me sleep on that. I will tell you tomorrow." He replied. "I love you, Commander."

And with that, he was gone. You took a few deep breaths before punching a wall, seething.

"If you're contemplating the break up, you don't love me as much as you say." You hissed under your breath, before leaving the room as well to tend to your own duties.

\---

The room you shared with Trahearne was originally meant just for him. You, as the Commander of the Pact, were meant to have a room of your own, but decided against it in favour of spending as much time as possible next to your beloved Marshal.

That was, of course, until that night.

You knew his party had returned because you could hear the noise outside, Pact soldiers and scholars chatting and laughing together. For what you could hear, you guessed the mission was a success.

You decided against walking out to welcome them. Not because you didn't care; in fact, you were glad to hear how happy they sounded. But because you knew what was coming. You knew, even before he walked into your room, what was going to come next. And you knew you were not ready.

But the time came all the same, when the Marshal of the Pact knocked on your door. You got up slowly and opened the door, giving him a flat look before letting him in.

Trahearne walked in awkwardly and scratched the back of his head, seemingly looking for the right words to start. You stared back at him with your arms tightly crossed over your chest, hoping he would make it quick.

"I am not giving up on you." He began to say, rubbing his face. You took a small breath, about to sigh in relief, but he raised a finger, signaling that he wasn't done.

"I am not giving up on you, Commander, because I have faith that you can make something great out of this Pact." He kept going, pacing. "But I don't want to hold you back. I don't want to hurt you anymore. You can do better, so much better than me... And I intend to stick to that. I believe you can have a better chance at life, at love, and anything you put your mind to, as long as I'm not there to drag you down."

Your jaw dropped as he spoke. You felt as though someone had stabbed you right through the chest with a flaming Greatsword, and for a second your mind went blank. _This can't be happening_ , you said to yourself. _This is not real._

Yet here he was, telling you the words that you had always feared.

"But- That's not something I agree with, Trahearne..." You whispered, feeling short of breath, gasping desperately for air. Trahearne winced and shook his head.

"You may not see it now, Commander, but... We are not meant to be. You deserve so much better." 

You let out a sob and shook your head. "No! I was- I am- I am happy with you! I don't care for who you think I deserve or not! I... I want you..." You finally broke down, sobbing endlessly as tears streamed down your face.

"I want you, too." He said, his voice soft as velvet. "I just know that you can do better than me, and I don't intend to hold you back on that."

"Trahearne, why are you doing this?" You yelled, clenching your fists at your sides and panting. "I- We had a lifetime planned! A whole new life together! After- after all this was done with the Pact- We- All of our plans? What about that?"

"We may never know, Commander." He replied, covering his face with his hand. You shook your head again, unable to process what was happening.

"So that's it, then? You're giving up on me?" You asked at last, wiping the tears away.

Trahearne nodded.

You covered your face with both hands and wept openly, unable to hold back anymore.  _After all,_ you kept thinking _, we were not meant to be as I thought we were._

Maybe in the future, you wanted to tell yourself.

Maybe he'll realise, after a short or long amount of time, that your relationship was indeed the one.

But until then, it was just you. Just you, and the deep, painful, deafening darkness that now surrounded you. It felt like being trapped.

You felt dead again. Except this time, there was no waking up.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry ;-;  
> If you wanna, I recommend you listen to Fun, by Coldplay ft. Tove Lo, to get the real feel of this fic.  
> I hope you like it!


End file.
